this has been a fun week. i believe in things were meant to happen. i had 3-4 people in the 2 weeks invite me to facebook and linkedin sites. man, did I ever! i connected with old co-workers from my advertising days and started getting back in touch with those i’ve lost touch with just because of busy days with a family.

wow! it’s been so cool. i hooked up with a friend who I thought had disappeared somewhere on the border of texas. got back in touch with a friend who is in the military somewhere in europe. got back in touch with a couple of my first mentors in the advertising business and remembered how lucky of a start I had with my m&j crew. they taught me everything i know about the graphic design in the computer age. found some friends that i just hadn’t talked to in ages.

i feel so much a part of my world. it’s not too bad being 37 (i’m not old). i have 37 years of relationships. each person has given me something that has become a part of me. (personal note: coming to terms with being 37 – my birthday was this month)

my little miss priss enlightened us all this week. it was beautiful to see what joy there are in the simple things in life. her brother was shaking a baby bowling ball and hitting down little penguins pins. she has never laughed so much and just bellowing for such a little baby. she thought it was the funniest thing.

it reminded me to slow down and enjoy simply moments. i’m reading a book called ‘Inner Peace For Busy Women: Balancing Work, Family, And Your Inner Life’ and it is enlightening. highly recommend. i’m at the beginning and it suggests giving yourself a whole hour a day. omg, can i do it? lots of great advice. I’ll keep you posted.

be present!

he says the craziest things… yesterday he was speaking of a germ book that they read at pre-k. he said that germs were ‘downright disgusting’. needless to say, we could not stop laughing. then, went on to say that dinner was ’simply delicious’. we were having spiderman macaroni.

we have been telling him how truly funny he can be. he’s learning about himself as a 5 year old and this has been truly entertaining and wonderful to experience watching my son grow into a young boy.

true love.

well, i have been to work now 3 1/2 weeks. it’s actually going better than i thought it would. it helps that my mom came to visit and c1 has been able to stay at home with her. just seems like such a relief. so, probably not feeling the full affect. they are really happy i am back at work (my clients and co-workers). they have LOADED me with projects. luckily, i’m trying to keep myself at only 3 days a week working. as one client said, ’so, when you are home, you’re NOT working’. i’m still working on the whole boundaries bit, but hopefully this will be the best balance for myself and my family needs.

i start back to work on monday after 4.5 months of being off to help my little one start out her life. i have so many mixed feelings. i don’t want to go back because i worry about my little one without her family around her all day. at the same time, i do like the independence of my 8 hour blocks of concentration and me time. am i being selfish??? i do need to help in the family money, but it just seems like i should work harder to find another/better way. so much guilt for a mom…

i put c1 in child care for 2 hours on monday… i was fine until i got into the car. i can’t believe what i had just done. i keep praying to God to tell me the best path for me and my family. i keep feeling i should continue on my path at my company. bless them, I can work a cut schedule of only 24 hrs a week – 3 days a week right now. i do feel blessed, but it’s so hard to know what is best.

I have realized for me to ‘get’ things, God has to push me pretty hard to make me change courses… i.e. lay off to start my own business, offer me a great job when i’m 8 1/2 months pregnant, have the crazy child caretaker ‘fire’ me… you would think that i might start getting it. maybe i’m being a bit hard headed too.

i see how well d5 has done all these years of me working part-time and i have seen the benefits. i see my stay-at-home mom friends — 50/50 shot on its great or its hell. actually, i have those moments. as long as I can be there for my kids at their school, homework, a hug, answering all those ‘why?’ questions, or just when they need someone to sit in the same room, i think i’ll feel i’m doing my best job.

time will tell. so far so good.

well, things are going better this sunday night. my head doesn’t fill so foggy. life in co has been enlightening this week. my oH and I are doing a little better. we have a plan. which means, I need to stop reading my thai friends blog and writing my blog and go read my required reading for this week to make a better life for myself, my oH, and my little ones.

2 wks and I go back to ‘real work’. not looking forward to it right now. so much of me wants to be at home with my kids, but i know it is for the best. some stability and always helps with the money. i need to help financially, but I wish there was a better way. i have options, so I want to feel them out on what is best for myself and family. i will continue to pray, God has answered so many prayers of mine. right now, i think i’m on the right path.

well, i just want to get my life organized, if that is AT ALL possible. i’m starting to make small steps and remembering the bigger picture. new years always give you a fresh start to reinvent yourself. what will this year bring? the jury is still out. many know of my personal struggles, and that is my focus this year. here’s what i’m focusing on this year….

to be stronger with god and myself

to be the loving, caring mom

to be a loving, supportive, strong wife

to simply my life

organize my priorities

and, in my spare time… organize photos – digitally/albums.

what will yours be? and, what always gives me hope when I have a bad day… as my dad always says, ‘the sun will come out tomorrow’.

it’s official. i’m exhausted. just did a spreadsheet of the household responsibilities and it is not even near close to a balanced household. surprise. i’m shattered and it’s 1:45a and need to go to bed. I have had exactly 4 hours out of 48+ hrs of the weekend. And, all of these hours to take care of my needs came after 10p yesterday and 12a tonight. and in those 4 hours, i have written baby and christmas thank you notes, paid bills, figured out my checkbook status, ls packages ready to mail, bd present purchase for hubby, and finalized ls party (5 min).

So…. time to reflect on the day/week didn’t happen today or yesterday. going to bed. I’m shattered. more to come tomorrow. where/how do I get relief????

my cousin said just yesterday… we make time for the people we want to make time for. we are all busy. he is so very right. so, this is a year to organize priorities. time with my children, family, and friends.
one of my best friends moves away to the other side of the world and I wonder where did the time go? we have lived in the same city about 5 miles apart for over 6 years. we have known each other for about 16 years and i don’t feel like I made the best time I could have. granted, to be fair, she has 3 kids, me 2, work, husbands, college sometimes, and life is busy. we always seemed to manage to get together for lunches regularly, but it just doesn’t seem to be enough.

we always pick up where we leave off, and I hope I will be good at coorespondence via blog/email. I’m better at email/phone, to be honest. as a friend, I pledge to her, I will be the best I can be as her friend. bless her and her family.

i miss my friend.

welcome… thought I could add insights of my own. this whole blog thing is new for me.  i had some good friends move away and I have gained insight from her blog, so I thought this would be good for her and other friends/family to learn more about my days with my lovely family. and the craziness daily life brings.